


sadder daze

by I__A



Series: dead end [1]
Category: youtube - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Dialogue Heavy, Drabble, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Reincarnation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-12
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:00:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24139273
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/I__A/pseuds/I__A
Summary: ethan is lonely. he meets mark. and then he isn't lonely anymore.the last cycle of a soulmate reincarnation au.
Relationships: Mark Fischbach/Ethan Nestor
Series: dead end [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1826359
Comments: 3
Kudos: 80





	sadder daze

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [one hell of a year](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22013917) by [babyhandsnestor](https://archiveofourown.org/users/babyhandsnestor/pseuds/babyhandsnestor). 
  * Inspired by [Weird Autumn](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28410105) by [ChilledLime](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChilledLime/pseuds/ChilledLime). 



> oh no not me making another angsty au. inspired by the Deadend LT comics by animauxing on tumblr. please do yourself a favor and read them for the love of god they’re so soft but hurt so much.

Waves of blue fill up the soil in vivid coloration, a deep sea of flowers flowing in the summer breeze. Sounds of the ocean carry on with the scent of a salty breeze - the sun a comforting blanket enveloping everything the rays touch in a gold warmth. He feels connected to the rumbling of the world, cotton kisses and soft petal beds overwhelming all senses. If he closes his eyes he can see the veins of his eyelids, the sun is so bright, so warm.

Mark hears Ethan shift to sit up, his shadow blocking the warmth from reaching his skin. Even so he doesn’t feel cold - the warmth is everywhere he reaches. He slowly opens an eye and meets the younger man’s gaze - Ethan’s eyes are filled with specks of gold, escaping the hazel coloration and dotting across his face in light freckles that only appeared in the sun. His lips were turned up in a childish smile as he leaned over the older man still laying in the field of blue flowers. 

“You’ve been sleeping for a very long time.”

“Is that so?”

“Did you have a nice dream?”

_Did you have a nice dream?_

“I don’t remember.” Mark’s gaze rolls up to the sky. White fluffy clouds assorted in random shapes float by - they never cloud the sun. “I dreamt that I lived through many lifetimes, seeing the world grow and decay in the span of several millennials, but sometimes I felt as if only several days have passed since the beginning of time.”

“Makes sense,” Ethan comments. “You’ve been sleeping for a very long time. Don’t your muscles hurt?”

“They hurt many times in my dream.” _I don’t feel anything right now._

“‘S not what I asked.” 

Mark looks back at Ethan. His smile fell into an unreadable expression, but Mark knows Ethan better. His eyes are his favorite to look at - a forest of green and brown bathed in blue and specks of gold, tempered like a storm, swirling with emotion. He’s known those eyes for so many lifetimes - _so why doesn’t he recognize that look in his eyes?_

“Ethan?”

“Hm?”

“Where am I?”

“You’re home, silly.” Another easy smile. “Where else would you be?”

“Where are the others?”

“Others?”

“ , and , and-”

“Who?” Ethan tilts his head. “It’s just us here, Markimoo. Just like it’s always been.”

“Doesn’t it get lonely?”

“I’m not lonely.” Ethan’s hand wraps around his - a familiar warmth absent from his touch. “We have each other. What more do we need?”

_I’ve been waiting for you for a long time._

“You’re acting weird, Eth.”

“I’m always weird!” he laughs. “‘S why you love me so much.”

“If you say so.” 

Mark doesn’t mind the cool touch of Ethan’s hand - he squeezes it once and brings it close to his heart. Ethan’s breath catches in his throat. He feels the expansive touch of cotton pressed against warm skin, the rise and fall of Mark’s chest, a faint heartbeat hidden deep within. 

They stay there for a long time. In the distance, a clock chimes twelve. Ethan eventually falls to Mark’s chest, pressing his ear against his heartbeat. A sigh slips from his lips, and they hold each other closer. 

“Do you remember anything else from your dream?”

Mark watches the clouds take shape into a large white mass in the distance - a thunderstorm passing by.

“You know, it’s funny. In all of my lives, no matter where I was or when I existed, I always met you.” He smiles. “You were always annoying in every single one.”

Ethan holds Mark closer.

“That is funny,” he agrees. “Because I don't remember asking.”

Mark laughs, and Ethan swears that even after all this time it’s still his favorite sound on earth: the rumble of his throat, the shake in his shoulders, the raucous way he throws his head back and smiles..! 

Ethan smiles into his shoulder, trembling from holding back a myriad of tears. He feels infinitely safer in his arms, a summer’s day brimming with sunlight to scare away the loneliness eating away at his soul - Ethan’s scared of what’ll happen when the final day brings it all to a close and this illusion fades away. He presses even closer - it's almost near uncomfortable at this point, Ethan's pressing his body against Mark's, limbs tangled together. Mark doesn't notice Ethan trembling at first, he's still too caught up in his own laughter. Ethan's heart shakes in his ribcage, _Why couldn’t I meet you?_

Mark stills after a second, then asks

"Where did all these flowers come from anyway?"

"You've been sleeping for a long time. I tried growing red flowers for you while you were gone, but before I knew it the whole island flooded with blue."

_I wanted to give you a proper hello this time around._

"I like it." Mark unwraps one arm and feels a blue petal from a nearby flower. "It's pretty. Reminds me of you."

_And, soon, a proper goodbye, too._

"Is everything still okay in the future you saw?" Ethan asks. _He knows the answer._

"Well... I don't remember much. But we're still together, so I guess we're doing all right."

"Good," he _humphs_. "I don't want you leaving me anytime soon."

"I'll always be right here for you, bub." He rests his head on top of Ethan's. 

But always isn't forever this time around.

So Ethan holds Mark close, and Mark holds Ethan even closer, and soon he'll disappear and leave Ethan alone again.

**Author's Note:**

> did i mention it's also inspired by kjellbach's au where felix is tired of being lonely so he creates marzia in his head? check it out here:
> 
> https://www.instagram.com/p/B2kMtRfHqBC/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link


End file.
